By myself

Stood by myself in church today. Just me. No babies. No Skyy. No Sunny. No parents. Just by myself. A few open chairs to my left and a few to the right.

A year ago today, if you would’ve asked me to stand my myself, I would’ve had a full blown panic attack.

But today, the boys were with their dad, Skyy and mom were in the choir, Sunny was a few rows back with her best friend and dad was working in the nursery.

And, I just stood there. No nose to wipe. No hush to mention. No stroller. No hand to hold. No question to answer. No outfit to straighten. Nobody to impress.

I’ll be honest, I didn’t know what to do with my hands. 🙂

But, then I did. My hands sank calmly by my side. I rocked back and forth. Sang the music. And, just let the tears run down my face.

As I stood by myself, I knew I wasn’t alone.

The ones I loved the most were exactly where they needed to be.

And, I was standing by myself with the exact person I needed to be with.

Alone.

Me and God.

It was pretty cool.